I’m Bertie Ahern, de Taoiseach.

I’m in a bit o’ bother lately wit de feckin tribunal. Just ‘cos my memory isn’t as good as it used to be.

I found me old diary de other day dough and dis will show dat O’Neill fellah dat I’m as honest as any politician. Here’s a bit I wrote in 1993:

On me way down Drumcondra road dis morning what did I find in a paper bag, only £30,000? D’as great. Now I can buy dat house for Celia dat she has been on and on about.

I must remember to call de lads in de revenue later on today and tell dem or dis could come back and bite me in de arse in a couple of years.

See, it was all perfectly innocent. I put it in de constituency account for safekeeping and den bought de house wit it. All perfectly legit.